It’s no secret that we like college football around here. And this week is one of the best, as collective fan bases reach a fever pitch anticipating the coming weekend of kickoffs. Yesterday Brandt sent Reid a picture of the Gamecocks’ new helmet with the Carolina script logo, but made to look like the Chick-fil-A logo. See for yourself: It was pretty funny (even though the actual unaltered helmet is solid), but it got us thinking - what teams match up best with what fast food restaurants? Yes we are aware others have done similar things before, but like a chicken finger everyone has their own take on it. (And ours is the best). Arby’s - Turning initials into a word at a place focused on beef. TAMU. Aunt Annie’s - Their specialty is pretty good, but that one thing doesn’t always get the job done. Navy. Blimpies - Does the same thing that many others do, just not as well. Kentucky. Bojangle’s - When it is good it is awesome, when it is bad it is infuriating; either way always leaves you wanting more. Their fans never understand why they just don’t always plan to serve fries in the morning. South Carolina. Boston Market - Their relevance was brief and ended years ago. Wake Forest. Burger King - Had a great run years ago, not really sure where it went wrong but it did. Nebraska. Captain D’s - Your decision to patronize is indefensible to anyone paying attention. Louisville. Carl’s Jr. - Nobody around here has an opinion because they are more western than southern. Missouri. Chick-fil-A - Doing it their own way with results that are making others take notice, and Christianity is a major part of the leadership. Clemson. Chipotle - An endless cycle of gorge and regret with occasional salmonella fears. Texas. Church’s - Some swear by it, many do not. Virginia Tech. Cookout - Seems like it should dominate, but never quite hits the spot. UGA. Dairy Queen - Left heaving in the dust as others zoomed past. NC State. Del Taco - Hard to find in the South. Arizona. Domino’s - If you have to spend more than 30 minutes waiting, your degree is free. UNC. Dunkin Donuts - A favorite of people from the North who now live in the South. Duke. Firehouse Subs - Consistently very good, occasionally fantastic. Oklahoma State. Five Guys - The king. Alabama. Fuddruckers - You forget about it, but it punches above its weight class. Troy. Golden Chick - Should be better than it is. Virginia. Hardee’s - Has tried to reinvent itself, and still in shambles. Maryland. Hooter’s - You know what you came to see right? Jorts. Florida. Hunt Brothers Pizza - Only found in boondocks convenience stores next to this team’s apparel. Tennessee. In-N-Out Burger - Has its regional worshippers, but they are blind to the facts that others have pulled ahead. Oregon. Jack in the Box - Potential at any point to cut you off at the knees. Georgia Tech. Jersey Mike’s - For those who appreciate paying more for better quality. SMU. Jimmy John’s - Never anyone’s first choice, but sometimes this is what you are left with. Michigan State. Johnny Rockets - Not just stuck in the past, but focused on it. Arkansas. KFC - They are everywhere but nobody really likes them. Notre Dame. Krispy Kreme - When the Hot Now sign is on they are tough to beat, otherwise keep driving. Southern Cal. Little Caesar’s - A self-proclaimed national title and $5 will get you a Hot N Ready pizza. UCF. Long John Silver’s - You don’t know anyone who has ever been there, and yet they are still hanging around. Boise State. Manchu Wok - This is a decision devoid of self preservation. Baylor. McDonald’s - Been around nationally since the beginning, and will be around nationally after you are gone; both the subject of unflattering documentaries. Oklahoma. Miami Subs - Has been really bad for a long time. Kansas. Moe’s - Most of their team is a Joey Bag of Donuts, but every now and then they pay extra for the guacamole. Susceptible to The Homewrecker. Ole Miss. Panda Express - Only found at the mall, often in the form of something free being given out. Florida State. Panera Bread - The smarter, healthier choice that is unreasonably expensive. Stanford. Papa John’s - Will always be known for inexplicable behavior by the person at the top. Ohio State. Papa Murphy’s - They say it’s fast food, but it feels like work. Boston College. Pita Pit - Not even sure why they are open during the day. Hawaii. Pizza Hut - Should have retired years ago. Kansas State. Popeyes - Always a fun decision. LSU. Qdoba - CHEESE ON EVERYTHING. Wisconsin. Quizno’s - Briefly peaked and on the wane. Houston. Taco Bell - Only acceptable after 10 p.m., but then it becomes a real option. Washington. Sbarro - Both are hard to spell and full of grease. Mississippi State. Sonic - Qualifies as a date night for some. West Virginia. Smoothie King - Target demographic is 19 year old girls. FAU. Starbucks - A mainstay for rich kids and you won’t find anything approaching a football game on at either. Vanderbilt. Steak n Shake - Honestly, do you know anyone who likes this? Utah. Subway - Forever linked with child sexual abuse. Penn State. Wendy’s - A force in the 80s, slacked off for awhile, now resurgent. Miami. Whataburger - Supposed to be pretty good but nobody cares outside of Texas. TCU. White Castle - A “big house” owned by a group out of Columbus, Ohio (true story). Michigan. Zaxby’s - A regional favorite that can be the best on any given day, but one extra bite is too much. Auburn. Enjoy your weekend! Filed/RS and BG
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November 2022
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